TMC ep3 revisit

tmc episode 3: Welcome to the Manly Catholic. In this podcast, we will inspire, challenge, and equip all men to become the men they were created to be. Join us as we journey together to become the best versions of ourselves and strive to change our communities one man at a time. Hello again and welcome everybody to yet another episode of The Manly Catholic. On our last episode, we Father Dom and I, by the way, I'm James, and with me as always is Father Dominic. Father Dominic. He's here. so on our last episode we talked a little bit about the just basically give you an introduction of Into the Breach by Bishop Olmsted and the purpose of the exhortation. And today we want to give you guys, well, first of all, introduce the three questions that Bishop Olmsted wanted to address and answer in his apostolic exhortation. But today we want to give you the context of why those questions are important and why they even matter in society today. So the three questions that Bishop Olmsted wanted to address in his apostolic exhortation, the first one is what does it mean to be a Christian man? How does a Catholic man love? And finally, why is fatherhood fully understood so crucial for every man? So those three questions are really gonna important. I'll probably sprinkle them in throughout the episode just to keep you guys in tune to what the context is throughout this episode. So, in context, the first context he wanted to speak about he's just simply titled A New Apostolic Moment, the New Evangelization. And for those who are not familiar, With the old evangelization, it was basically Jesus' great commission, right? So evangelization, that if you want to just define it, is sharing the gospel of Jesus Christ by all means available, such as preaching, teaching, witnessing a fruitful and faithful family life, etc. etc. And so the old evangelization, like I said, was Jesus' great commission. That comes from Matthew 1820. I have r right written here. and then it says from verse 18, then Jesus approached and said to them, All power in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always until the end of the age. And so Bishop Olmsted talks about how that's basically already taken place in America here. We've already done that essentially. Pretty much most people here in America have heard about Jesus in some way, shape or form. So with the old evangelization, obviously when Jesus commissioned his apostles, the whole world had not heard of Jesus. And in this day and age, especially with social media, with the internet, with YouTube, that seems to be obviously there's gonna be people that haven't fully in some neck of some corners of the world, but for the most part That's pretty much been done with. And so he transitions that to the a new evangelization. And so, some background for you all on that is a popular term, especially after Vatican II. Pope Paul the sixth actually kind of coined that during Vatican II. And then JP II, my patron saint, he really made it popular also Pope Benedict the Sixteenth as well. But JP two was kind of the one that I guess brought that to the forefront of the church. And so the USCCB defines it as the new evangelization calls each of us to deepen our faith, believe in the gospel message, and go forth to proclaim the gospel. And he says the fo the focus of the new evangelization calls all Catholics to be evangelized and then go forth to evangelize. So and it goes on further from there, but in many ways this is kind of what happened to me in a sense, but in a positive way. So I we talked about on our our first episode, Father Dom, that we both grew up and you grew up a cradle Catholic, I grew up Protestant. correct. Yep. And we both were never really challenged. And I think a lot of people nowadays, when they first get challenged, they decide to abandon Christianity or Catholicism or whatever. But for me, it it actually made me dig deeper into my faith and actually strengthen my faith. And but the problem in our society now is that I think a lot of people They get challenged firstly and then they decide Okay, I should leave then because someone has challenged my beliefs, but in reality were those beliefs really deep within them. So it was just maybe, my parents told me that was what to believe. I grew up a in a Christian family, I grew up in Christian schools. And so I guess that's what I should believe 'cause my whole inner circle is believing that too. and it so is it it makes me think about Jesus' parable it's kind of what is our foundation built on? You know, built on a rock, built on the sand, built on what was the other one? Rock. Sand. Wasn't there a third one? Thorns? That's the sower of the seed. gosh, yeah. I'm I'm combining I'm combining parables. I like I like I like a tree. A tree with deep roots can weather other any storm. I like I like to st I like to stick with that one. it's interesting you talk about the new evangelization and the old evangelization, and it's Jesus is the same yesterday, today, and into the future. It's it's not really necessarily discovering it anew, but it's it's proclaiming it, I think, I think more boldly in many ways. And and I think what has been lost is a sense of education of the faith. So that when someone is challenged like you're talking about. It's like, do they have that stability? Do they have that foundation to be able to rise up to that challenge? and in our secular culture today, those challenges are all over the place. I was thinking about it yesterday and I said to myself, Well looking at my life, my past life, and moving from the somewhat of a secular understanding and back into the church, it's wow, if if you really just tell someone, hey, do the opposite of what secular culture tells you to do. And I think inevitably you'll find yourself walking closer to a Christian life, not even knowing about it. Sadly, yeah. Yeah. So I think a lot of the new evangelization is bringing forth what has been old, what has been the foundation of of Christianity in this country and in our family and has been eroded away slowly, you know. We've been desensitized, been eroded away slowly over the po course I think of fifty, sixty years. And then all of sudden we find ourselves with a powerful secular culture telling us that there is no moral objective truth, telling us that subjectivism and relativism can be the models and guides of which someone can project their life. And everybody becomes their own their own individual God. And I mean just chaos ensues. So bringing forth this old evangelization into the new evangelization, at least in my understanding and my mind's eye and in my experience and especially being a priest, just barely a year, it's let's bring back the beauty of the church. Let's bring back Bishop Barron talks about it all the time, right? That truth, the goodness and the beauty. You know, that's a good part that's a deep part of it as well. Let let's let's bring that back. Let's bring back the the beauty and traditions of the Mass. Let's let's bring back the beauty and and the traditions of of of deep family structure rooted in Christ, rooted in the church. Right. it that that's one of the reasons why you you started this podcast, was it not? It's it's almost like, hey, let's bring back what authentic masculinity is. Is it toxic? It doesn't make any sense to me. Masculinity is not toxic. A man can act in a sinful way, right? But man is made good, creating an image and likeness of God. Masculinity is too, and it's it's not toxic. You know, it's something that there's a lot of power there. I think the new evangelization, especially wrapped into the podcast that we're starting, is is what what is authentic masculinity? And again, going back to these. three questions that you began to unravel and then jumping into that first context, the apostolic movement, the new evangelization, at least from a man's perspective, it's yeah, what what does authentic masculinity look like in the light of Christ? Right. That's part of the new evangelization. And I think that's part of what a lot of men in this country need need to open up to and realize. And I don't think they know. And it's not it's not us Catholics taking masculinity and hey, this is Catholic masculinity and pounding guys on the head. It's it's like, no, the this The church has it right when it comes to authentic masculinity. It's like this can be applied to any man. It doesn't matter what what religion or denomination or what country or who you are Muslim, Buddhist, Hindu, Protestant, Catholic, nondenom, atheist, I don't care. We need we need to discover that authentic masculinity again because it's gonna call out innately in every man, Wow, okay, this this is what this is what it looks like to me man. And and And I firmly believe, and and Bishop Olmsted does too, that okay, if you want to discover authentic masculinity regardless of who you are, he says that Jesus Christ is the epitome of what it means to be a man. So again, what does the new evangelization look like in light of becoming a man and using Jesus Christ as that as that model for for the new evangelization? Right. And I think one of the underlying questions too is that it's it's sad though that we even needed a new evangelization if if you think about it. it's basically 'cause what they describe what the US C C B describes and what JP two talks about is that it's basically re evangelizing our house, or the church. And, you know, for too long there were Catholics, Christians, you know, name it, that again they just showed up because that it was expected of them. And I mean you see of all the people who have left the church. I mean, I Fulton Sheen's quote. It says, There are not one hundred people in the United States who hate the Catholic Church. But there are millions who hate what they wrongly perceive the Catholic Church to be. Yeah. And I mean, Bishop Olm said, you like you talked about, yes, we are at the new apostolic moment in the history of the church. But just like men in the past have already done, we need to step it up and enter into the breach. And as you said, Father Don, if we always remember the gospel of Jesus, we will always have hope. And I think we talked about this in past episodes, but we I mean we know the outcome of this battle we're in, right? I mean, Jesus already won the war. The war is won, yeah. But as there's battles along millions of little battles along the way that we're encountering. Exactly. His souls are at stake. Exactly. So what does it mean to be a Christian man? Right? That's one of the primary three questions that Olmsted lays out and then jumps into the context. And our first context was right, the new evangelization. So if one wants to be a Christian man, how do they live out this new evangelization? And This may sound Easy or this may sound Stupid, but it's to pray. Yeah. You have to pray. You have to enter into a relationship with Jesus. If you're going to have this new evangelization, enter into it, you you have to pray. You have to pray. You got to put time aside every day to pray. If you want to know Jesus, you have to pray. It's like a relationship, you know. It's right, the relationship that you had with with Betsy when you first started. It's like you didn't know her, she didn't know you. Right. And looking at the relationships in in my past before coming a pr coming a priest, it's the same thing. It's you gotta spend time with her to get to know her. Absolutely. And and then when you do, you can share those hopes, you can share those fears and desires. And you know, they they fill in the end of the sentence before you can because you know each other so much. And it's the same with Jesus. It's like we have to put time in front of Jesus. Ultimately, that's that's that's the meaning of life right there. You're developing that relationship with Jesus. And we we have to s we have to start and a lot of guys don't even know how to do that and that's okay. part of being a man is also being vulnerable and owning up to your to your weaknesses as well, saying, Hey, I okay. Yeah, the the Manly Podcast is always telling me to pray, but honestly I I don't even I don't know what to do. I don't know how to pray. Yeah. I and that's I don't that's fine. That's absolutely fine. That's a great place to start. Just admitting that you c you don't know how to do it. Jesus will meet you there in the damn moment. I mean, that's what he does. That's that's his job. When you say when When you say, Hey Jesus, I want you to come into and whenever you finish the sentence, he's already there. I want you to come into my life and you know, he he's already there. And so you just have to start with that. And it could be just a little prayer in the morning, you know, Jesus help me to pray. Yeah. You know, that's part of the new evangelization and that's part of, you know, becoming a Christian man and what that what that looks like. Well, I think too, another thing that I on my notes here I wrote about was especially nowadays, I mean, with the media we have, there are so many great resources out there. Yeah, we're doing it right now. Exactly. And that that when I when they talked about the new evangelization, I put to the side, hey, this is this that's this podcast. that's what we're trying to do. And there's so many great things available at our disposal. there's apps. If you hey if you don't know how to pray, there's an app called Hallow that I would highly recommend. It reminds you, yeah. It gives you yeah, it gives you reminders. we're always on our phones, might as well why don't you use your phone for something for good? Yeah. Something that exactly distorts you know what What human being is. And we all know what men are really using, a lot of guys are using their phone for. And it's I that's all that's a whole nother that's a whole nother podcast, but we but why not use the phone for for good? And I you know, honestly, that's part of the new evangelization. And JP too and Benedict even talked about that as well. Okay, the advancements of technology and social media, it's moving really, really, really fast. So, you know, the Catholic Church reaches out and says, Hey guys, let's use this to spread the gospel message. Right. Right. We have not We ha we haven't even experienced this type of technological movement in the history of man and it moves fast. So let's use it to spread good, not evil, right? Let's let's let's feed our souls with our iPads, our laptops and our iPhones with with something good, you know, good documentaries, good podcasts, good good prayer reminders, you know, in s instead of instead of honestly using it for for porn or for something else. And And and part of being a man, right? Is is doing something that's hard. And developing a prayer life of discipline, that's hard. It is hard. And I think one of the things I want to get your take on too, Father Dom, is in a sense with this new evangelization, do you think the church in a sense kind of dropped the ball in terms of hey, we have all this great media and I guess the culture took advantage of that. hey, we have social media, we have technology, we have the internet. And I I kind of joke with my wife sometimes, and I feel like Catholicism, not Catholicism, but Christianity in general, it's like the music is getting a lot better. The films about Christian principles have gotten much better versus the you kinda laugh in in the past growing up in the nineties, it was they're all pretty cheesy and corny, but we we kinda laugh about it, but for for people who and Bishop Barron talks about this all the time is, you know, bringing beauty into it and the I mean, I know his Catholicism series really turned a lot of people on to the Catholic Church because my gosh, look at it. I mean, Catholicism has so much going for them in terms of the arts of, you know humanities, things like that, but I think just until now we haven't really highlighted that. And I think for a lot of people who might be on the fence, that could be what brings them into the church. Yeah, it absolutely could. the church is two thousand years old and it's it's seen a lot. You know, y y you mentioned about leveraging media in a in a good sense. You've talked about Baron again, we've talked about him a couple of times and in what he's done. And that's just one facet. I I think all we have to do is really open the door to the deep, rich history and tradition of Catholicism. And I'm not just talking about architecture, though that's very important. I you know, I'm not just not talking about the early church fathers and the apostolic fathers in their writings. That's very important. I think we're seeing a movement now in people wanting to know more about the mass, wanting to know more about liturgy. What is it? And and I think they're starting to crave and desire and realize that there is something in the liturgy of the mass that speaks to our human nature at a level in which no other type of language can comprehend. That's what's beautiful about the Catholic faith, isn't it? And you can go to a Catholic church wherever you are in the world and you feel like you're home. That that that's that's a that's a that's a language that just speaks beyond, you know, simple comprehension. Right. The the the liturgy is so deep, and I've seen in my life when I came into the faith, even my understanding of of reverent, beautiful liturgy, the mass, as is continuing to to deepen. And it i as it should. Because we as human beings we can't grasp the mass and liturgy like we can financial statements or a business plan or a mission statement. it's otherworldly. It it's not of human origin. The liturgy is a gift given to us by God in order to give him due worship. Right? That that's that's what the liturgy is. And so I think part of this new evangelization is is that discovering a new the old liturgy. And I'm not I'm not talking about you know liturgies that that that that go back thousands and thousands of years or you know what I'm I'm just talking about just the very fact of of of liturgy calling something out in us, you know, that nothing else really can. It's it's a supernatural experience. And I I really do think people are starting to to grasp and and understand that and yearn for that. And once they get a little bit of of experience of that or or a taste of that, if you will. It's like they'll want to come to Mass, not because they have to, but because they want to. Right. They want to. And I think once we start showing Reverent Liturgy as priests, myself, the the the people will come. The people will come back. I that's what I think. People will come back though. I mean that it's such well that's the that's That's the new evangelization. Yeah, exactly. It's getting And people coming back because they're gone. Right. Look at the ladies. The N-O-N-E-S. Look at not only not only atheists, but anti-theists. These are these are the people, I think, especially the nuns. it's a blank. They're like a blank slate. They are. They don't know. Like, I I I I I wear my manipole to mass. Every mass, weekday, weekend. I don't care. I wear my manipul. And that's that piece of cloth that I wear over my my left arm, which signifies that I am a man and I am working at the liturgy. Because it really symbolizes that because I'm working at the liturgy for the people, offering the sacrifice of the mass in persona Christi Capitus de Ecclesia, right? Jesus Christ, the person, the head of the church. I'm not worthy. That's just the way it is. He called me to it. And and and I'm working. And I'm s I use that manipul, that piece of cloth, symbolically to wipe the sweat from my b brow, because I'm working. And the tears from my eyes, because I'm offering a sacrifice on behalf of the people. I'm taking their prayers, their desires, their petitions, their needs and and fears, and they're placing it on me. And and so that's that's what I that's what I use that for. And people ask, hey, what is that piece of cloth? They don't even know it's a manipul. Or or why why do you wear that long black dress? Well, that's a cassock. And know what those are? This is part of the new evangelization when it comes to liturgy. Those are opportunities. Absolutely. They're opportunities to teach. And when and when they understand what the manipul is and what I'm doing, it's opportunity because it opens them up to asking the question of Well, why why do you have to be a man working? What what does that mean in the liturgy? What do I have? I have to offer something in the mass. And all it was was they saw that piece of cloth hanging from my left arm. Right. Or or father, why do you wear that that cassock? And then I can I can explain to him what cassock is and and why I wear it. And then it just opens up a whole nother avenue and opportunities for so many other directions to go in. And it's it's it's beautiful. It's wonderful. The traditions of the church are are absolutely the they're full of purpose. Right. So in the second context that Bishop Olmsted brings up, he calls the church a field hospital and a battle college. And exactly what you just talked about father dom is these these small opportunities to teach, to train, to equip. I mean, he I'm gonna go a little out of order here, but he talks about a battle college. And I know in our discussions we've had, you talk about equipping the laity to go out into their communities. And that's something that maybe the church forgot a little about now nowadays, apologetics is such a huge thing. Catholic answers, they have full time apologists on staff. there's just so much good apologetic work out there, but but to be honest, most people don't probably listen to all that stuff. I mean f for a lot of people too, it's not the word I'm looking for. It's not obtainable. Maybe the yeah exactly. So it it's not in language that maybe they understand. And so and they might they might think, well, I go to mass every Sunday, isn't that good enough? It's a good place to start. It is a good start. I if they go every Sunday, that is a great place to start. That is an excellent place to start. I tell you what, that's you're ahead of the curve. But in in a sense though too, I mean the the church is Is designed to to build us to engage in this spiritual battle. And I think the church is is becoming much better at that, at equipping the lady to do that. I mean, you talked about earlier how you know, the traditions of the church are starting to to to come to life again. There's more people yearning for that. They're hungry. I I think they're hungry. People are they they've seen what secular culture has been doing. Well, absolutely. It's destructive. And and and they think well okay, there has to be something better. Right. And I think too the lady aren't afraid anymore to to say something. They're not just relying on our bishops will take care of that. And absolutely the bishops play an incredibly important role in this. But the we can't just rely on the bishops, the pope, our priests to defend the faith. Like that's our job. as well because some people will never hear a priest speak in their life. They might only encounter us as Catholic men and women. And so what are we what are we doing to evangelize? I mean it talks about too, I mean it's not just preaching. It's not just talking about the faith. It literally could be your actions of there's something different about how that man interacts with his wife and his children. And I want that. Yeah y you guys, you guys I mean mean like you James, a lay person, married, family, working, you're in the front lines, you're in the trenches. Right. The church is a safe haven for you and your family. That's where you receive the sacraments. That's where you you receive the graces to go back out there in the battlefield in the trenches and to do battle. As a priest, I've kind of exited that in many ways. I have one foot in this world, one foot. And it's supernatural, let's say. In seminary they they really drove home and I like it that priests are really a bridge from this world to the next. And I do have one foot a little bit in your your world, if I should say that, but you really are in the trenches. You're right. The lay people are are in the trenches. And that's how important, the church is to them as well. It's this safe haven, this place where they can receive the sacraments and confession and the Eucharist and baptism and it's this it's the place. It's the it's the body of Christ. It's a place where they can go for for refreshment and peace. And but y you're right. I think you hit the nail right on the head is you guys are in the front those front lines. Especially when Satan wants to attack your family. Right? When Satan wants to get after your kids and your wife. Again, it goes back to the garden. It's like you y you guys, you you're Adam. You know, are are you gonna stand up or you're gonna you're gonna lay down? You have to protect your family, and that's part of being in the trenches. And I think the context that Bishop Olmsted describes he calls it a field hospital and a battle college and it's so appropriate because you just you just mentioned it. That the church is our home or our safe haven. I forgot how what the words you use, Father Don, but it it that's a field hospital, right? Like that's where we Yeah, Sanctuary Exactly. That's that's where we go if we're wounded from battle. Exactly. Exactly. Confession. The Eucharist. It's I'm I'm telling I'm telling my my spiritual directees, let's get you in a state of grace. Because then that will in a sense give you like your battle armor to go out and fight. Right. And it'll also teach you how to use the sword of the you know the of the spirit, right? Your breast bless breastplate of of of righteousness, right? The helmet of salvation. It's like you the the the the field hospital is that church and that battle college where you go and you're healed, but then you learn. I love that. I I've read this so many times, I never caught that. Battle college. I like it. What is a college? It's a place where you learn. Right. You learn what? Well, you learn how to battle. What man doesn't want that? You tell me, James, what man does not want to fight the good fight? You tell me. I don't know any men who don't. And just a little side note. I I think they don't know it. I don't think they know that there's a good fight out there. Is he that That's true. That's absolutely true. And I It's a worthy fight. And we're designed for it. Well what what other fight is there to do really if you if you want to break it down? we we come up with Yeah, you're right. Things in our head maybe like like my job. I think I think a lot of men find purpose in their in their work and their job and they might create battles to I need to get that next promotion, I need to get here in my career and then I'll be satisfied. But I mean we we we all know it's nothing satisfies us outside of Jesus Christ, of course. And then just a little side note on confession. growing up Protestant, obviously I didn't I never went to confession, but confession I can easily say has absolutely changed my life. And I'm gonna issue a little challenge to you, man. If you haven't been to confession, I would challenge you to go this week. It is truly life transforming. And every time I go, I I never want to go, to be honest with you, but it Even just giving it up, giving it to to God and saying, God, I I messed up and I'm sorry. And it is such a weight off of your shoulders and the more you go the better. I mean it truly you truly feel changed and renewed. It's a and I got off yeah. It's a gift. Yeah, it absolutely is a gift. And I know I got off topic there, but that's my little challenge to you guys. I'm taking over Father Dom's challenge this week. Well you we'll use that. We can take that. All right, perfect. All right. I'll give you taking the reins. I'll give you dispensation. All right. So I did wanna come a little bit back to the field hospital analogy and Pope Francis said the church say is a field hospital after battle and then he kind of talks about what are we battling, you know, sin, Satan, demons, whatever you wanna to word it. And then he said the church is a constant source of mercy in order to endure and overcome The wounds that we all bear. And I just put, we are all sinners in some way. And the church is the powerful source of truth to heal men and prepare them to battle another day for Christ. Again, healing your wounds. And so when I kind of talked about that, when I was reading this and and thinking about this, I I wrote, I think that in a in a sense is why when the scandals started to emerge and come to light. Think that's might have been why people were so shocked and dismayed, because the church has always been a sign of hope. And I think it lost a little bit of that in society's eyes, even though society is constantly attacking it, but in a sense that we we're always battling something, right? And I think culture the Catholic Church is obviously and usually the the easiest enemies, quote unquote, to pick. And I think in a sense like, well If the church isn't perfect, then I mean w it kind of destroyed a lot of people's images of the church. So like, well, yeah, society might be bad, but at least the church is still good. And of course we know the church is still good, but I think in a sense, you know, they people looked at it as it as a field hospital, like, I can go to the church and and receive comfort and then I don't know. I I'm no I'm kind of rambling, but that was just my take and and I was trying to connect it because I think that could have been why so many people were so dismayed by it. Yeah, absolutely. You know, it's yeah, it's yeah, it's a tough one. you know, my heart goes out, you know, to all the victims. And you know, when God called me to be a priest, it was, you know, just really a couple of years after some some pretty pretty big stuff, you know, you know, hit the fan. And I'm asking God is like, why do you want me to go? And be a priest in the midst of all this. It's like, I'm not like that. Right. I don't want to be part of that. And you know, I just felt Christ saying to me, you know, I woo I'm wounded. And I want you to come and help. And I want you to help make this this church of mine, my bride of Christ. That's mine. It's not yours. It's mine. And that's what makes a church holy. Right? It's full of sinners, you, me, bishops, the pope, cardinals. A church is always holy. It's always spotless. It'll always be that field hospital that we can come into. And for some strange reason, Jesus Jesus thinks that I can help in some strange way. Maybe I can bring a little light to somebody's darkness. And if I can do that in this little field hospital, then I would consider that a success. Yeah. And in our time right now of of need in the church, again, we need authentic men. So in relation to the context to the field hospital and the battle college, right? Just something that that came to my mind as we kind of quickly glossed over this and talked about it briefly. Le learning in a college of battle, right? You go to the college and you and you and you learn you're taught. You learn how to battle. And one thing that that's very important At least in my life, maybe James, you've experienced this as well. There's something about Doing something hard every day. and I'm talking about It could be as simple as making your bed every day. Yeah. I'm serious. No. I'm serious. There's there's studies that show success. Yeah. You know. What are some of the top five things successful CEOs do? Number one, make their bed in the morning. it or it could be voluntarily jumping into the the the pool at the YMCA that's just cold and you don't want to do it and you swim. Could be hitting the weights. Right. you're doing something fasting, you're doing something that's difficult every day. We have to do that. And that's what I love about Exodus ninety when I when I did that. did you do that? Yeah. I did. Yeah, you did. I did do it. And the beautiful thing about that was that band of brothers, and they held you accountable. And you did something difficult every day. Yeah. Those cold showers, man. Well, yeah, the cold showers. I kind of ended up liking them. Father Dom's a weird. But we still love them. But yeah, thanks, James. But honestly, though, doing something difficult every day lowers your orders your lower appetites. It orders your lower appetites. Doing something daily that involves controlling your lower appetites will help build what? It'll help build virtue. This is part of this. This battle college. Virtue is very, very, very important in a man's life. Virtue is a good habit. Of course, a habit is something done over and over and over again. A bad habit done over and over and over again leads to what? It leads to vice. And that doesn't help build your masculinity, authentic masculinity. But if you do a good thing like prayer, you develop that prayer life every morning and the afternoon and in the evening. Or you pray that rosary with your family every day and you, the priest of the home, lead it. That's very important. The man has to lead that rosary. If you create that as a habit, praying that rosary with your family every day turns into a virtue. turns into a virtue. And you can lower your you can order your lower appetites with that. So I think that's just something to to think about. We could talk about, you know, appetites and you know the appetitive nature of of things, you know, and and later, but it really is disciplining yourself to move out of a vice that holds you down and moving into a habit of virtue that begins to build you up. And doing something difficult every day, fasting, Changing your appetite or changing changing the way that you eat, working out, just doing something difficult. Maybe, maybe waking up early, you know, to get that prayer in. Something. Something that leads to virtue. Do something difficult every day. That's not your challenge. I think we already talked about that challenge. You st you stole that from me. I won that battle today. But no, it's and I think instinctively, men like challenges. They like to do things difficult and I think our society almost with the technology and everything that we have now, it's almost become too easy for us. And obviously technology is fantastic and everything that's happened if you use it for the right reasons, but we we become reliant on it in a sense. It's you know, we use our GPS every time we get in to the car even though we're going home. You know, it's we eat the same things every day, even if we shouldn't be eating those things because they're they're good. And you know, s no, it it's silly though, but I mean something as simple as making your bed it it seems again, like I said, it seems silly, but it really does set you up. It's like your first victory. I even heard too, not snoozing your alarm. Cause when you snooze your alarm, think of it as your first challenge of the day. I will not snooze my alarm. I will wake up. I failed that this morning. just to let you know. Vulnerability here on the mainly Catholic. But it's y you're right though. I mean whatever challenges you, whether it's working out, eating right, making your bed just doing something a little bit differently that day that is difficult for you. it is tremendous value. it doesn't even have to be spiritual. obviously that Father Dom says, just starting to pray would would be a huge value, but just giving yourself something. you all you men out there listen, you know what challenges you. So don't be afraid of it. we'll be praying for you. Always and always, always before you do something challenge you give it to God. Just say, God, yeah, this is gonna suck. I'm not good at this, but I know it's good for me. And so I'm giving it to you. And God loves that. And that's what Jesus did in the garden. Bishop Olmsted says again, authentic masculinity is grounded in the person of Jesus Christ. What did Jesus do in the garden? He said, I don't pretty much he said, I don't want to do this. Let this cut pass from me. But then he said, God, if you want this to be done, then your will, not mine. And so he did it. And he what he did was very, very hard. And look what it did. And we can do those in small ways in our life too, with husbands to their wives and to their kids, to your coworkers, to your boss, to your employees, as as a priest, to your staff, to the people you meet, hospital in the nursing home, to your families at the at the parish, in the church. It's it's very important. Speaking of authentic masculinity, and I mean he goes into in the third part, kind of surrounding the the context, he says men and women are complementary, not competitors. And obviously we can go in a thousand different directions with this. but there's a couple really powerful quotes that that I wanted to read that really struck out to me. And he said, I mean, the first one, the complementary of masculinity and feminin key to understanding how human persons image God. Without knowing and appreciating this, we cannot know ourselves or our mission as men, nor can women. Embrace their own vocations, confident in the father's love. And then he goes on and says, Men and women are certainly different. And obviously, like I said, we can open up a can of worms with that. But my my take, and this is coming from some conversations I had with my wife too. And there it's funny, there was a talk that she listened to that really helped her understand me and men in general. It was actually by a husband and wife. And I think they were both psychologists or something. And he said, Men think in waffle squares and women think in spaghetti. Spaghetti. you've heard this, yes. And their their point was that men and women's brains are are indeed different. And men think very categorically organized segmentally so my wife it's funny now after she told me that and she asked me to do something when I'm already doing something she says get out of that waffle square and come into this one so it's kind of become a running joke in our household. But but no the the the point the point I'm trying to make is that even though we're different, we are perfectly made in God's image. And in the page The and another part of it I actually never thought of men and women this way as a couple. We always heard, you know, man is made in the image and likeness of God, and obviously women are too, but then he said, But also man and woman as a couple are the image of God and the difference between man and women is not for opposition, but for communion and procreation, always in the image and likeness of God. And I guess I never thought of my relationship with my wife as made in the image of God. I mean, you you hear, you know, two become one flesh. And obviously that's very powerful, but e essentially when someone looks at our relationship, us as a couple, they should see God in essence. And not only us as individuals, but it's like, no, like those two are trying to be holy, they're trying to be saints and They should see God working in us and through us. Yeah, they should see a representation of the Trinity, right? Reciprocal love back and forth, right? Y yeah. I mean k yeah, men and women created an image and likeness of God, right? They're equal in dignity. Equal in dignity. Men and women are equal in dignity but very different. Very in person. Very different. And and that's beautiful. It's awesome. That's where the complementarity comes into play. Absolutely. And I think he made a really key connection and I I highlight and wrote a ton of notes on this, but he he talks about well, first he says when God is forgotten, the creature itself becomes unintelligible. And and then he goes on and he says, I asked myself, this is from Pope Francis, by the way, I asked myself if he talks about gender theory that's going on nowadays, but he asks, Is it not an expression of frustration and resignation which seeks to cancel out sexual differences because it no longer knows how to confront it. And I thought that was very profound because we see nowadays we don't like different. We don't like differences. And if you are different than me or you believe something different than me, then there's something wrong with you and I'm I'm right. We we've lost we don't confront challenges anymore in society. We try to eliminate them in essence. And I thought he Just reading that quote from Pope Francis, it it r it really just, connected for me everything going on, especially you can talk about politics and my goodness, how divided we are in this country. But yeah, we we don't like c conversations that are uncomfortable, that are difficult, or that make us not necessarily challenge or I guess you could say challenge the way we think, but in a healthy way, saying Okay, I never thought about it that way, but let me go do my own research and then I'll get back to you on that. Yeah, everything's just based off emotions. Right. You know. And and that's that's kind of a dangerous place to be. I I mean if I based my decis if I base my life decisions off the way I felt from time to time, I'd you know, that would usually end in disaster. Let's just gosh. You'd be both. Let's just say that. But you did s you did say something that really really struck a chord with me and it had something to do with once you eliminate once you eliminate God and there it is. Yeah, when God is forgotten, the creature itself becomes unintelligible. That's a powerful statement, don't you think? Absolutely. When God is forgotten and do we live in a godless society? I think it's pretty evident in many ways. Okay, so Right. At at worst, a godless society. Okay. At best, God is private and it's for you, not in the public square. But if it's good for you, then then okay, but but you're still pretty weird. Right. Right. I mean, it's so I I would say that we yeah, we do live in a mostly, I think, godless society or just reserved for that private sphere. And when God is forgotten, how are we able to define ourselves? We can divine ourselves however we want. And that doesn't make any sense to me because we don't have we don't really have control over anything in our life. we can make decisions, right, that lead to certain consequences of our actions. But if we don't have God in our life, then what's the point of life? In in a sense. And so people can just commit can make their own lives. They can create their own life. I mean, we're all subject to corruptibility. I mean, the laws of physics. Things come in and out of existence. And if you forget about God and and the society becomes godless, I think fear sets in. I think fear sets in and I think it manifests itself in very interesting ways. I mean, look at this past year with with with COVID. man. Yeah. It podcast for another day. Podcast for another day. And I've seen a I've seen and heard and witnessed a lot of fear. A lot of fear and it manifests itself in different ways. It's like we need to bring God back into the society and bringing things full circle, right? I think it begins with with men and women praying. Right. A man and a a husband and a wife praying together is very powerful, right? A family that prays together stays together. Or if you're a single man, develop that prayer life now. Because if you get married, you're gonna need it. If you get married, you're going to be the priest of your domestic church. And a priest leads his people with prayer. That's what I do as a priest in my domestic church, which is my parish with all my all my families. Right. And they have to see me praying. They look to me. How does father pray? Kids look to their father for examples. So I have to lead a holy life to the best of my ability, and I have to stay in prayer. I have to stay committed to the promises I've made as a priest to pray. My liturgy hours every day, my holy hour every day, my rosary every day, praying mass every day. And my kids will see that. And at least I can be an example to them. To bring in God back into the society, us men. We need to start praying. We need to be those examples. We need to be those examples. I think I think that that's the answer right there. Sure. I mean we can break everything down and quantify it and you know, collect data and all this stuff and create algorithms and equations and make it hard for it. But it y you guys, we need to pray. You need to bring Jesus Christ into your life. That's that's how we have to start this thing. All right, Father Dom. So I think I won the challenge this week. So my challenge for you men this week, no matter how long it's been, go to confession, seek out your local parish. I was gonna say find a spiritual director. That would be two challenges, but we'll talk about that another day. But no, honestly, I like I said, confession has has truly changed my life, and I highly encourage you. It's it's gonna be hard. You're gonna have a knot in your stomach because you don't wanna do it, but just go and do it and the graces that come from it will be tremendous. I on honestly, that you find your local parish, jump on the website, find when they're having confessions, and go. Men do things that are hard. Confession is hard. You're a man, go. It's it's that's what you have to do. Plain and simple. It's beautiful. It is beautiful. It'll change your life. Beautiful, isn't it? What I just said is very beautiful. It's beautiful. Father Dom is a beautiful man. Alright, everybody, for us here at the Manly Catholic, again I'm James. With me as always is Father Dom. We are signing out, and we'll see you next time on the Manly Catholic. Thank you all so much for tuning in to another episode of The Manly Catholic. If you have not already done so, please hit that subscribe button wherever you get your podcast to make sure you don't miss a single episode. It will also help grow the show and reach as many men as possible. possible. We truly think this podcast can change families and help men to change the world. Thank you again so much for tuning in and God bless you.